One of my Spiritual Sisters has started her blog … I thought I would share in case anyone who follows me would be interested in following her as well ❤
Being a pagan can be so freeing and life-changing, but sometimes it puts you a new set of rules. I write this to reach those of you who have found a path and have come to a standstill. Well your journey isn’t over it’s just beginning.
What is an eclectic pagan? You tell me? What a pagan is to me is a person who believes in many Gods, many entities; Divine Beings. I am a melting pot. Forged from mythology. The Greeks and their heroes, gave me solace that the world wasn’t always boring. Mythology is how we interact with the Gods, how we know their personalities and background. Read as many myths as possible from all over the world if anything you will be filled information and astounded on how brilliant they really are. The first step into the mists of eclectic paganism is to understand that you are…
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I don’t know if I will get this to come out clearly, and I don’t know if writing it all down will help at all, or not, but something in me keeps saying I need to blog. I am concerned I will sound like I have stepped off the edge. I am going through a lot of changes right now. I know from talking to others, and reading others posts and blogs that I am not the only one, but there are days I seriously feel like I am loosing it or like I broke something.
I know this is a year of change, for everyone, in many ways, on a universal level.; and I know without a doubt, that this has been a huge year of changes for me personally. Let me start by saying that even though many of the changes have been rough I do not think that they were bad. I know that change is a necessary part of life and of growth and that some of the most painful transformations bring the most profound changes or lessons. For the most part I had been dealing with this pretty well.
A lot of the changes, for me, have been internal and core level. For the most part I recognize the changes and the shifts it has made in who I am and I embrace that. There is at least one change that I am struggling to figure out exactly what has changed, what I got rid of, what issue was tweaked, but even though I can’t quite put my finger on what it is I am comfortable with it, whatever it is … or I thought I was. Now I am wondering how much of that has led to these most recent changes that I am not so sure about. My gifts have been changing as well, for the most part they have just been getting more refined, my energy feels more consolidated and I am feeling everything more deeply than I ever have before. It is almost like I am registering everything at a soul level not a surface level, for example someone asks how I am doing I automatically look at the core of myself, not the surface emotions and this has confused more than one person. I have also had new tools start speaking to me so I am in process of learning how to use them. I see all of these things as good changes and while it has been a major growth year it has been exhausting at times.
Recently though, like the last two to three weeks, things have been changing by leaps and bounds and I am not keeping up well. I really noticed the start of it all with the death of my Grandfather, that drudged up a lot of internal stuff and family stuff that I had to emotionally deal with. So I had to do some intense internal evaluation. After that process, within a few days, I started noticing a cacophony of changes all at once, now whether these changes really all happened at once or whether that was when I just noticed them I can not say.
I feel heavy … it is like the air has gained 20 lbs of weight at all times … it isn’t like I feel heavy inside, the weight is coming from outside of me.
There is extra internal pressure – there is a pain at the base of my skull, it feels like a migraine except there is no associated migraine pain in any way … it just aches constantly and cracking my neck, my herbs, salves and pain meds do not make it stop … This has been going on for almost 2 weeks now and this one I would be happy to have leave
My body is aching constantly – It is not the pain that is associated with my neuropathy, my nerve damage, my arthritis or muscle damage … these pains are in different areas of my body and they are presenting differently than I am used to with the chronic pain I live with.
My Empathy and my emotional vocabulary are changing – Like I stated earlier, I am now feeling the soul level depth of feeling, this includes people I am picking things up off of. For example, when I see a post on fb, I get the actual energy of the person who posted at the time they posted so even if it is a happy post I may feel anger or sadness … if they are happy then I feel happy but I know that is the energy of that person when they posted … This happens real life and in person too …
Last week I saw one and the level of sadness I felt had me concerned, it was a soul crushing level of sadness … I got ahold of the person who posted it, I couldn’t leave it alone … Once I talked to this person I realized that my actual vocabulary has changed as well … They said they were going through cyclical waves of emotion that day and while there was some sadness involved there was nothing they would of described at that level of sadness … So we talked some more and this person was talking about feeling a level of disgust for the way things are going in the world around us and the apathy they see all the time … It hit me then that that is why I was picking up so much sadness, what this person was describing as disgust and distress registered with me as their soul was heartbroken sad over this issue … This is what I mean by the change in how I am registering emotions and how it is at a soul level, not a surface level.
My traveling has changed – My gift in this regard has changed as well. It has always been a pain in the ass to explain so I will do my best here … When I travel I know I traveled because I wake feeling like I was working all night, sometimes I wake with a feeling of needing to do something but I never wake with actual info (frustrating as all) but at some point in the near future I will have a moment where all of a sudden I have info that I have no way of knowing and I know in my core that this information is correct I also KNOW I learned whatever the info is when I was traveling. Up to this shift that info has always been for me, personally or on my path, or it has been information for a close family member … it has always just been a short snippet of info.
With this shift it has changed drastically … I have been traveling every night … I have gotten so tired that I have been calling on Raven, and sleeping with stones, to keep me here and let me get some rest … In the past that has worked, right now it isn’t working at all … In this I accept that Universe and my guides have a plan that I am just unaware of … but the messages have changed too … I was talking to another friend earlier this week, or maybe at the end of last week, and we were having just a regular conversation when all of a sudden I just blurt out with “Well you know you carry a ….. as a guide right?” (I am editing the parts of that conversation that do not feel like mine to share) I then proceeded to go on for about 30 min about this guide, that they are trying to work with her, that she knows them already, that having this as a guide makes so much sense to me …. I could describe this entity in detail to her … She knows me well enough to know that this is unusual and I told her that without a doubt, my soul is positive, that this is info I got while traveling. She has gifts of her own and is able to sense things, she knows if something doesn’t ring true, and she agreed with me that this is where this is coming from. Since that conversation this has happened 4 more times with different people, this week.
This change is something I am not sure how to deal with, since I don’t have the information when I wake up I can’t prepare, and every time this info comes to me it is unexpected and out of the blue. I have tried not saying these thoughts but that does not work, my brain will get to a distracting level of noise until I just spit out whatever it is Universe wants me to say.
I am actually hearing things now – As a child I saw ghosts/spirits, that stopped when I was about 5 or 6 and I threw up walls that I have not been able to remove … I can’t remember what that child did to protect herself … Since then though I see ghost or spirit animals, only animals … and I sometimes feel spirits around, mostly my daughter, but as a rule the dead do not talk to me …. Since this shift I have begun to hear them …. nothing major, I heard my Grandpa say “hello” when I was on a phone call with a friend … I heard 2 other voices during the same call but I do not know who they were … Then 4 nights ago I am standing at my living room window looking out and I heard Mercer crying from upstairs … He was my 17 1/2 year old Flame Point Siamese and he died at the beginning of August. He had a very distinct cry and my Misha likes to mimic but she was laying on the couch right next to where I was standing and it wasn’t her … It sounded so real that I actually went looking to see if I could find out where it was coming from … There was no cause for the noise and I know it was Mercer. I really do not know what to think or how to feel about this change.
I feel apart, separate, disconnected – This is going to be the hardest thing for me to explain. I am grounded, I am all together, I don’t feel like part of me is missing or not returned from travelling and this is in no way scary or icky feeling … but it is weird and awkward … I feel almost like I side stepped and stayed there, except like I said I know I am all together … I feel like I am watching everything from the outside or from a distance … I know there isn’t a delay, I register everything normally, yet somehow it feels like there is a delay in my registering things … Like I said this is really hard for me to explain and this is the change I am having the most difficulty with.
It has taken me 3 days to write this blog, I really struggled to make everything make sense. I hope if anyone reads this that it will make some sort of sense to them. I am not exactly sure why I felt the urge to write all of this out, but I did and Spirit says it has to be posted so I hope that it will somehow help someone who may be going through similar things.
Brightest of Blessings to all ~ Raven’s Child
Merry Mabon to all!
Today, as I am sure you know, is the Autumnal Equinox. Today day and night are perfectly balanced and from this point forth we begin our journey into winter.
The seasons are changing and now is the time to give gratitude for our abundance and the gifts and lessons we have received throughout the year, both literal and spiritual. Now, to me, is time to take stock of everything, to evaluate all that we have experienced and to begin to process it all.
Now is the time when all the crops are in and we let the ground rest, when we let the earth replenish herself so that the crops we plant next year can flourish and thrive. So too is this the time to allow ourselves a rest & replenishment of sorts.
In my opinion, and in my way of doing things, Mabon truly begins a period of annual introspection and evaluation. To me, this is not a time for new undertakings, instead this is a time to go in and prepare our “spiritual soil” for what is to come in the new growing season. This is a time when I go inside and I truly assess all that I have learned and experienced in the year so far. I evaluate everything, my path, my relationships, my interactions with others, my reactions to situations, and even those things I think I know. Nothing is left unexplored. Over the next month or so I will begin working on anything that needs addressed, anything I find during this time that may no longer serve my higher purpose and I will be working on implementing the lessons learned, or any portion of the lessons that are not yet implemented at any rate.
For me this period “ends” (I put ends in quotes because truly it never ends for me but the intensely focused aspect of the way I do this does) with Samhain and the New Year at which point I truly feel like the new growth cycle begins for me. I know we won’t see signs of life for many months to come but I feel like this is when the seeds of all I have learned in my introspective process truly begin to take root, and are truly seen in my life.
Do any of you share a similar process at this time of year or do you see and or treat this time of year differently? However you honor the holiday may your blessings be many, may your lessons be well learned and may you be ever abundant in all ways! Brightest of Blessings to all! ~ Raven’s Child
When I started actually studying my path, and not going based on just instinct, one of the first things I studied was animal totems, guides and messengers. Since my path began with the animals and my understanding of them, in childhood, I thought this was a logical place to start.
I never read one source and call that good. I will read every source I can get my hands on, and never less than 6 different sources providing they can be found. When reading and studying, on any topic, I tend to keep and use what resonates with my soul or what gives me a “this is correct” heart feeling. The rest of the information stays with me, I do not ignore it, I just don’t incorporate it into my path, until or unless it becomes relevant or useful. What I found really had me confused, and questioning my own feelings and instincts on the topic.
I read so many books and websites, from many different paths, and what I found was that about 95% of them use these terms interchangeably. One source will call something a totem another source will call the same thing a guide and yet another source will call the same thing a messenger. There are some sources that will call the same thing by all 3 terms and there are other sources that refer to them as animal allies. Then there are other sources that refer to all these things by one term only. This, all of this, truly upset me. It had me doubting what I felt in my core, and what I “knew” in my heart of hearts. This actually almost derailed me from my path …
I will get back on track here in a second but I feel the need to explain that statement. Until I started studying everything I had done had been done based on instinct and what came naturally to me, the majority of what I do today still is based on instinct and what comes naturally to me but now it has been refined with study and introspection. There are other things that I have incorporated because they ring true to my soul. So when I started to actually study it was very difficult when I could not find information that matched with my way of doing things, or find others who operated similarly to the way I did. The fact that I could not find info that matched had me questioning the way I believe and feel. It had me questioning if what had always worked for me was right or if I had in some way been fooling myself. Due to this I spent months in self evaluation, analyzing everything, tearing everything I thought I knew apart, looking for where I was wrong or not, meditating, talking with Universe and “listening” for answers. I went through this process until I came back to center and found myself again. … Now to get back on point
So I completed my introspection and had clarity. People will be hard pressed to find too many sources that agree with me and I am now all right with that. This is what is right for me. I am sharing all of this for 2 reasons … 1 – It may potentially help people to understand how I use the terms going forward reading my blog & 2 – Maybe there are others out there that feel the way I do who are looking for information that resonates with them.
This is how I use these terms, and what they mean to me. I am only referring to Animal totems, guides & messengers … I am not discussing Spirit guides, Ancestors, Astral Guides (although they are sometimes animals), Familiars or any of those beings. That is a different topic completely, to me. I am only discussing the animal totems, guides & messengers that come to us in this lifetime, and on this plane … all though I will grant that they also come to us in dreams and in astral. When one comes it may also not be in physical animal form, it may be through repetitive images, or mentionings in random conversations … They struggle to get our attention and will use any way they can to reach us.
Animal Totems – A totem is an animal that comes to us at some point in our life but once they come they never leave us. We tend to embody attributes of this animals medicine, or it brings a medicine that we need to embrace and incorporate in our lives. That animal is always there even when they can not be physically seen or heard, you feel their energy consistently. When an animal is a totem a person can reach out and “touch” their energy with a mere thought.
According to the majority of the sources I studied most people will have 7 totems appear in their lifetime. A few sources I read said most people will have 9 appear to them, this actually rings truer to me than the 7 does. People who are Shaman, or who are on a Shamanic path, may have many more as they may need those totems to help them in their workings or along their path.
Animal Guides – A guide is an animal that comes to us to help us through a specific lesson or challenge in our lives. They are generally around for a few weeks to a few months. Once the lesson is learned or the challenge is over this animal leaves.
Animal Messengers – A messenger comes to deliver a specific message. It may be a reminder that you have the wherewithal to do what you need, or that this is a challenge you have faced before and that you DO know what to do, or it may be a heads up about something in your world. Whatever it is once the message is received the animal leaves. The time this animal is around is entirely dependent on us, and how long it takes us to get the message.
For example, Hawk is a frequent messenger for me. He shows up when I am doubting myself. He comes to remind me to have courage, to own my shit & that I am prepared for whatever it is that I am doubting and questioning. Once I acknowledge the message he leaves.
Now all of this aside, I think it is important to mention that anyone can work with any animals medicine when they need it, even if this animal is not a personal totem, guide or messenger. For example … If a person is going through a difficult transformation period in their life they may find it useful to call on Dragonflies medicine to help them through … If a person is feeling beat up by the world or feeling the need to retreat to silence they may find it helpful to call on Bear medicine to allow them to den successfully and to emerge ready to face the world … If a person is trying to do void or dream work, or deep inner workings, they may find it helpful to call on Raven medicine to help navigate that which is hidden or unseen … If a person is facing a situation and they are worried they may handle it wrong they may find it helpful to call on Deer medicine to help them to see the peaceful path through the situation.
Their medicine is readily available to us and they want to help us, I truly believe that because of how hard they try to reach us when they are bringing us a message. I also believe that working with Animal Medicine helps us to appreciate the animals in our world further and gives us a deeper connection to ALL the beings around us.
I hope this blog will help others to understand my way of thinking better, to maybe provide clarity to others that feel the way I once did or to even just give someone the idea of working with the animal medicine that surrounds us.
Brightest of Blessings to all! ~ Raven’s Child
We have been spending our weekends camping at a campground we found and enjoy very much. This has been part of our “unplugged” weekends. One of the regular events at this campground is drumming and a bonfire on Friday & Saturday nights.
Friday night we were standing around the fire talking, and I happen to look down and see “Hi” in the end of a log in the fire. It had been an incredibly long week & before we got there I had set every intention of letting those energies go this weekend. So to look down and see “Hi” in the fire was just like a hug from the Fire element itself, it was like a reminder (to me) that fire will always help burn away all that needs to go.
I do not think it was only saying “Hi” to me. There were a lot of people around that fire; I got so excited when I saw it that I pointed it out to at least half a dozen of them or so lol, and I am sure that anyone who saw it got their own interpretation, feeling and message from it.
Beyond my own instant feelings it “felt” like there was more to it, or a deeper meaning under it all. So this morning I was sharing pictures on my facebook page and one of my friends comes in and says that she sees H7 and the rune Laguz under it.
I am a Rune person, I work with the Runes, their energies & the Galder Spellsongs; so I feel rather stupid that I missed the Runes presence in the fire. Maybe it was just that I was wrapped up in the immediate feeling, maybe this was the “something more” I felt, maybe I wasn’t supposed to truly see it at that time but whatever it was I see them now …
Looking at the Runes it would be Hagalaz, Uruz (almost) & Laguz
Hagalaz – The hail storm … Haglaz symbolizes the destruction of the old to make way for the new … We can not grow if we hold onto old patterns, old ways, bad habits, toxic & negative thought patterns, energies or individuals … What feels like utter destruction is actually like the seed cracking & falling apart to grow into the tree.
Uruz – **I said almost because it is incomplete on the left hand side, it would be the “i” of “hi” joined with the “7” if it was completely formed … I do not think that the fact that it is only partially formed invalidates it, I take it more as we are partway through this step of the message**
Uruz is symbolized by the Ox or the Mountain … Stay the course, hold strong and stable, maintain your integrity, renewing strength … I feel like this is saying to continue doing what we are doing, to remain who we are with our spirit resolute, and our strength will be renewed through the challenge.
Laguz – The Lake, Tranquility … A journey of self evaluation, of going inside to places most hide from and truly evaluating every tiny spec of self. Facing your dark side OR Having already completed this process, being one who is called upon to help others through the process of self evaluation. A Rune of the Spiritual Counselor.
Looking at the message of the Runes to me it is absolutely on track for many things happening in my world, and in the worlds of friends and loved ones right now. I have a feeling that this message is relevant to others as well.
I hope that in looking at these images, or that in reading my blog & interpretations, that something resonates with you … That if it does that you are able to sit with it and embrace the information you feel and receive … That it may, in some way, bring clarity to any current struggles, confusion or apprehension which you may have.
Brightest of Blessings to all ~ Raven’s Child
I hope that I can properly verbalize this post and what it is I am trying to convey ….
I was talking to a couple of different friends today, in completely separate conversations, we were talking about how life seems to still be being exceptionally rough for everyone we know, our lives have had several rough patches as well but those around us really seem to be being hit hard.
I know that everyone has rough patches and that they come and go, sometimes in serious clusters, through out our lives … This however seems to be a never ending cycle of one thing after another, non stop with no breathing room, for so many friends, acquaintances and even complete strangers who tell me what is going on in their lives, for month upon month now.
For those of us not being personally hit it seems as though we are tired at a core level, we are drained to the point our bodies hurt, many of us feel like we are traveling all night even if we do not remember the experience upon waking, and we are being called upon to be the support system, gladly and gratefully, for all those around us that are being hit so hard … I am speaking generally here but this observation is based on many experiences and conversations that I have both been part of, and witnessed, online and in person with others over the last several weeks.
There have been so many conversations in our circles of friends about things letting up when Saturn went direct, then it was maybe it will relax with the Blue Moon, then it was maybe things would let up with the New Moon, now we are praying things let up with the rising of Venus this Friday (like several astrological sites have suggested), part of me is concerned that this is going to keep continuing until Pluto goes direct at the end of September.
Today and yesterday were incredibly bad days for so many people we know and this is why we were having these conversations yet again today. Each of us (those that were involved in this conversation today) are empaths and healers in our own ways and because of that these sorts of things will make us batty so we have truly just been trying to make sense of all of this, to see the bigger message or to just figure out what it is we are missing in all of this.
About half way through one of these conversations today I had the over whelming urge to pull out my deck. When I say overwhelming urge, it had been being “noisy”, pinging my energy, for over an hour before I went ahead and decided to pull cards. This is not something I do very often, and I do not claim to be a professional reader or anything. Usually I pull for friends or when the deck is “noisy” like it was today and every time this deck has surprised me with how spot on it is and how I just understand the messages … This is a newer experience for me.
So I pulled the cards, in the way that I do … I do not do actual spreads, I shuffle the cards thinking on my question, I will cut them when I am “guided” to and then I go through them one at a time feeling with my receiving hand for the heart thrum I get when a card applies to the question. That heart thrum is my “yes” indicator. I wound up with 3 cards in this pull and several things jumped out at me immediately. First and foremost was the fact that this reading was not just for me, or for the friend I was talking too … I was hit with an overwhelming feeling that this reading was for so many people, that this was Universal, and that I really needed to share, hence this blog post.
I asked Universe simply “What is happening” and this is the message I got ….
Healing … I comfort you … Love one another
My interpretation …
Morgan le Fey – This is a time of major and painful healing, this card represents the cutting away of cords and ties that bind us and hold us back or keep us trapped in bad patterns and places …
Grandmother Magicks – This is a time of learning to be loved, of accepting that you are worthy of that love or of being one to provide that unconditional love, you may also see your animals acting bizarre, they are trying to comfort and provide that unconditional love and acceptance …
The Lovers – And all of this is so that we get to a place where we are able to love one another as we would be loved …
I know the lovers generally represents a relationship, one on one, but the feeling of this card in this reading was Universal, not one on one, this is love on a planetary and soul level.
The other thing that really stuck out to me, and I am not quite sure what to make of this, is the numbers of the cards … All the cards have numbers, I am pretty sure that is standard across decks but I do not know that for certain … The cards, in the order I pulled them were Morgan le Fey #9 … Grandmother Magicks #6 … The Lovers #3 … So the numbers were; in order, 9, 6, 3 … I feel like that is significant where as they are all power numbers, but I have not come to a conclusion on that.
I would love to hear any feedback or thoughts you may have from these cards and their meanings, I am truly interested in gut level, instinctual reactions as well. If nothing else I hope that this reading, and my interpretation (or what ever interpretation may come to you on your own) will provide some clarity and comfort at this point in time.
Brightest of Blessings to all ~ Raven’s Child